Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
Randomize
