i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
He has the fingertips of a God
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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