i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize
