Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
