Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
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