Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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