I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
