My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
