Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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