I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Randomize
