Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
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