Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Randomize
