i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
they need to just BURY HIM!
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
i drank out of a bidet.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
