where am i from again
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Boobs are out for the taking
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Randomize
