Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
are you so shy because you have an std?
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
I'm just crazy horny about you
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
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