Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize
