This girl is more easily done than said...
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize
