we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
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