she kept yelling 'call me bella'
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
Randomize
