she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
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