I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize