Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Hi. This might be awkward, but I met you on saturday at about 330 am. I have to admit I don't remember your name, what we talked about, or various details of how I got home. What I do remember is that I was invested enough in getting your number to ask my cab driver for a pen to write it down since my phone was dead. So do you want to meet, soberer, some time?
Hey bro I think you got the wrong number I'm a dude
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
Randomize
