handjob tips. give me some.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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