I'm jealous of your bromance
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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