she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
