He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
there was a trapeze. enough said
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
