There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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