Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
