You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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