When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Randomize
