This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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