she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
