i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
