Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
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