doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
