apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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