Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize