if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Randomize
