please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Randomize