haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
