so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Randomize