well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
