hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I'm experimenting with sincerity
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
Randomize
