And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
Randomize
