Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Swine flu is the new snow day.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
