you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
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