Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
He keeps bees of course he's weird
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
Randomize
