Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
false alarm. still invincible.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
