i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
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