it was like his penis was on wheels.
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
